Ten years ago, I took a leap.
The year before, I had organized ten public events to create space for the voices of our American Muslim neighbors. They were—and still are—facing a well-funded campaign of dehumanization.
What I saw from the stage at those events deeply concerned me.
I began to see what dehumanization does. It breaks down the social contract that makes society possible. It leverages and increases social distance. It prepares a society for hostility, exclusion, and even violence.
What began as concern for one community soon became something larger.
Over the last ten years, this work has taken me into the public square, into the social sciences, into the depths of many religious and cultural traditions, and into the heart of human vulnerability and possibility.
As I listened, I began to see that dehumanization does not impact only a few groups.
Nearly every group feels slandered, misunderstood, and vulnerable. Nearly every group fears that other groups have abandoned the moral agreements that make a society possible. Many people are convinced that everyone else has given up on fairness, responsibility, truthfulness, and concern for the common good.
- When people believe that, trust begins to erode.
- When trust erodes, cooperation becomes harder.
- When cooperation becomes harder, bad behavior, political hostility, and despair begin to grow.
I heard that despair again this past week.
Several people asked me the same question:
“Is your work making any difference at all?”
Given the fact that we seem, in many ways, to be in a worse place than we were ten years ago, I understand the question.
I ask it myself from time to time.
I have learned to welcome despair, offer it tea, listen carefully to what it has to say, and then let it continue on its journey to nowhere.
Because despair tells only part of the story.
Human beings are here because we cooperate. We cooperate within groups. We cooperate between groups.
That is how our species survived. It is how communities flourish. It is how societies endure.
Every culture and every wisdom tradition developed moral frameworks to strengthen that cooperation because our ancestors understood something important: when cooperation is endangered, people are endangered.
That is where we find ourselves today.
But we have been here before.
Every tradition has faced moments of fear, division, and distrust. Every tradition has developed wisdom for rebuilding relationships, restoring trust, and renewing community.
We have more wisdom available to us than we often recognize in the digital tidal wave of outrage and despair that washes over us each day.
That is why Paths to Understanding continues this work.
For decades, our organization has been gathering neighbors and growing trust. In this season of our life together, we are focusing on helping people have meaningful first experiences with those they might never otherwise meet.
Through the Potluck Project, people across the country are creating opportunities for neighbors from different backgrounds to sit together, share stories, and discover one another’s humanity. More than 250 communities and organizations have downloaded the toolkit so far.
Through Challenge 2.0, led by Jeff Renner, we continue sharing the wisdom of diverse traditions and voices, helping people engage life’s biggest questions with curiosity and respect.
Through our partnerships in Washington State and across the nation, we are helping strengthen a growing ecosystem of civic renewal organizations that are rebuilding trust and belonging in communities large and small.
And this summer, we are taking an exciting next step.
Building on the success of Let’s Go Together in Skagit County, we are beginning a new youth initiative that will help young people practice listening, belonging, courage, and cooperation across differences. If we want a healthier future, we must help the next generation learn how to build relationships across lines of culture, faith, politics, and life experience.
The challenges before us are real.
But so are the possibilities.
- Every conversation matters.
- Every relationship matters.
- Every act of courage matters.
And every person who chooses connection over fear helps build the society we deserve.
As we celebrate ten years of this work, I invite you to stand with us. Your support helps create the spaces where trust can grow, relationships can form, and communities can discover that they are stronger together than apart.
Thank you for being part of this journey.
With gratitude,
Rev. Terry Kyllo
Executive Director
Paths to Understanding